As I sit down to write this post, I continue to think about the events of the last few weeks. They have been tough to work through. Causing an aray of emotions, some of which I'm not sure I've ever felt. Sometimes I wonder when health problems will not be in the cards for my family...maybe someday. God doesn't give us more than we can handle...right?
I've started really traveling at work. I love it! I absolutely love it! I've had the opportunity to meet with several coaches in the area, as well as out west. I am really enjoying getting to know them, and figure out how I can best serve them and the huddles at their schools. I've been developing a pretty cool relationship with some girls at a school here locally. They are wanting to start a FCA at their school, but cannot find a teacher who will support them. I feel bad for the students who are super pumped up about it, and I wish I could do something. The girls have not lost heart yet! They are still powering forward with enthusiam and ready to start as soon as they find a teacher. It's been super fun to get to know the girls during this process!
I am realizing how much work goes into friendships. It is really tough to maintain relationships with people when it is pretty one-sided. More on this when I have more thoughts together...this is just something I've been wrestling through lately. One thing I know is for sure though, the work is worth it if the friend is really that important.*note: I am not a master at maintaining friendships, I am preaching to the choir on this, I know that for sure*
Finally, I have caved. I have been reading the Hunger Games. So far it's pretty good. I don't have a whole lot of time to read, but I've enjoyed what I have read so far. I am not a speed reader, so saying I am still on book one after having it for 5 days would be a shock to many I am sure. Most people I know would have them all read in 5 days. Well, I am not most people, and I definately do not have the time to devote to reading books like that. I really have a hard time reading fiction books, but I am really really trying!!
Well, I must go finish preparing for an event tomorrow.
FOR HIS GLORY
Friday, February 10, 2012
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
hello again...
Where to begin? It has been a while. I have a desire to blog. I enjoy doing so, but I get so caught up in life that I just don’t do it. A friend asked me about my lack of blogging the other day, I’ve ask her to keep me accountable to blogging at least once a week. I am pretty confident I can keep to that.
The last few months have been pretty full of growth, change, and the Lord speaking. I am much more secure in my job…still have a TON to learn, but I am feeling much better about it all. I am hearing from the Lord more about my life calling and the direction He has me in now. I am dating a wonderful guy. I am starting to find a routine and trying to balance life a bit better.
I am also in the Word much more then I have been thanks to a friend holding me accountable daily. Being in the Word is in turn revealing more of God’s mystery and I feel my relationship with Him growing stronger and stronger. We all walk through mountains and valleys. My valleys generally occur when I am not in the Word. I am so set on how I can run my life better, I know better, I am so so dumb when I begin to believe that! God is so good at revealing truth in the midst of our self-centeredness. How kind of Him.
I am also currently teaching a Sunday School class on being Radical (David Platt). I did an overview of the class last semester, and this semester I, along with Whitney, a friend of mine are teaching a more direct class this semester. We are having so much fun with it. We came to a realization this past weekend. We both recognize that we both received our calling into ministry in high school, but neither of us really knew what to do with it. We both went to college, (Biola/Lindenwood) and because of the training we received in the classroom, and the experiences we each had, we were able to discover what the Lord wanted from our lives. Whitney and I grew up and the same church and same youth group together, and we both agreed that we were not challenged while we were in High School. **This is not to bash the youth pastor at the time or any leadership** No one challenged our actions or thinking. We have been slightly discouraged because we are not sure we are getting through to the students attending our class. We then realized how many more distractions these high schoolers have today that we didn’t have 5-7 years ago. Seriously, it’s outrageous. We’ve come to the conclusion that we can only be a voice. We can teach these students truth, we can give them facts, and open their eyes to what Jesus commands of us, and how we have put Jesus in the American Dream. We can pray for them, that they will someday get experiences like Whitney and I had to open their eyes to what the Lord demands of them. But until then, we will continue to plant seeds.
FOR HIS GLORY
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Radical
(Disclaimer: I am wrestling with all of this stuff in my own life as well... so I am in no way attempting to be "holier than thou." Just expressing thoughts.)
"If we do believe it, really believe it, that belief has radical implications on our lives." -http://withthebigguy.wordpress.com/2010/02/13/david-platts-sermon-radical/
(I found this blog while searching for stuff on David Platt's book, 'Radical')
So I am currently teaching a Summit class (what we call our high school Sunday school class) on David Platt's books: Radical and Radical Together. I am finding this to be way different than I first thought it would be. You see, the more I am reading the books he wrote, reading the Word of God, watching and listening to sermons, and talking with people...the more I am actually realizing and understanding that we (Americans) have actually taken the Gospel, and we've contextualized it be be the American Gospel. Its so much easier to just live the Gospel we want it to be. And we my friends, have made it out to be something so weak and heartless, that I wonder what Jesus would say if he came back today and looked at us, "American Christians." Hear me out, I am not saying that all Americans are wrong and aren't living out what Jesus said to us. I believe there are a lot of believers who do...but I also think it's lived out while we are comfortable. I think we remain in a place where Jesus is kind, and loving, and compassionate, and doesn't show wrath, and wants me to be safe, comfortable, and stay right where He put me to begin with.
Here's the thing- Jesus spoke with strong language...Commanding a whole heck of a lot. He does have wrath, He is kind, loving, and compassionate. But I also think He asks us to be uncomfortable.
I was reading Luke 14 yesterday because our class discussion was directed to the same place two weeks in a row, due to this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hRkOMgohQE
How can Jesus tell us to hate our brothers, sisters, moms, and dads? That doesn't sound like something He would say... Oh but it is!
Luke 14:26-27 says, "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. 27Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple." (ESV)OUCH!...right? Anybody with me on that? Jesus is saying this as a comparison. Our love for Christ needs to be so terribly sincere and strong that it must look like we hate everyone else. Crazy, huh?!
Or how about this one "So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple." Luke 14:33 (ESV) Yes... that too is a 'really, do I really have to give up everything I own to follow Christ?' Question in my mind... But that's what Jesus says. It's right there... in the Word of God, written there in red letters (in most Bibles). Now for some that can be a figurative statement, and for some a literal statement. I think it is both. Possibly one more so than the other for some people. I think that really depends on what the Lord has called you to do. But what He says is clear. And we are so good and twisting it, or reading the words the way we want to. I was talking with some friends about how we can make the Bible say whatever we want it to say, how do you think the "prosperity gospel" came about?
So, have you contextualized Jesus' words to say and mean what you want them to say. Are you comfortable where you are and with what you are doing? Are you tithing because you should or because you want to be giving? Are you going to the poor? Homeless? Fatherless? Hungry? Are you boldly preaching the Word of God to those who don't know Him or His Love and Grace?
"If we do believe it, really believe it, that belief has radical implications on our lives."
For HIS Glory
"If we do believe it, really believe it, that belief has radical implications on our lives." -http://withthebigguy.wordpress.com/2010/02/13/david-platts-sermon-radical/
(I found this blog while searching for stuff on David Platt's book, 'Radical')
So I am currently teaching a Summit class (what we call our high school Sunday school class) on David Platt's books: Radical and Radical Together. I am finding this to be way different than I first thought it would be. You see, the more I am reading the books he wrote, reading the Word of God, watching and listening to sermons, and talking with people...the more I am actually realizing and understanding that we (Americans) have actually taken the Gospel, and we've contextualized it be be the American Gospel. Its so much easier to just live the Gospel we want it to be. And we my friends, have made it out to be something so weak and heartless, that I wonder what Jesus would say if he came back today and looked at us, "American Christians." Hear me out, I am not saying that all Americans are wrong and aren't living out what Jesus said to us. I believe there are a lot of believers who do...but I also think it's lived out while we are comfortable. I think we remain in a place where Jesus is kind, and loving, and compassionate, and doesn't show wrath, and wants me to be safe, comfortable, and stay right where He put me to begin with.
Here's the thing- Jesus spoke with strong language...Commanding a whole heck of a lot. He does have wrath, He is kind, loving, and compassionate. But I also think He asks us to be uncomfortable.
I was reading Luke 14 yesterday because our class discussion was directed to the same place two weeks in a row, due to this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hRkOMgohQE
How can Jesus tell us to hate our brothers, sisters, moms, and dads? That doesn't sound like something He would say... Oh but it is!
Luke 14:26-27 says, "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. 27Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple." (ESV)OUCH!...right? Anybody with me on that? Jesus is saying this as a comparison. Our love for Christ needs to be so terribly sincere and strong that it must look like we hate everyone else. Crazy, huh?!
Or how about this one "So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple." Luke 14:33 (ESV) Yes... that too is a 'really, do I really have to give up everything I own to follow Christ?' Question in my mind... But that's what Jesus says. It's right there... in the Word of God, written there in red letters (in most Bibles). Now for some that can be a figurative statement, and for some a literal statement. I think it is both. Possibly one more so than the other for some people. I think that really depends on what the Lord has called you to do. But what He says is clear. And we are so good and twisting it, or reading the words the way we want to. I was talking with some friends about how we can make the Bible say whatever we want it to say, how do you think the "prosperity gospel" came about?
So, have you contextualized Jesus' words to say and mean what you want them to say. Are you comfortable where you are and with what you are doing? Are you tithing because you should or because you want to be giving? Are you going to the poor? Homeless? Fatherless? Hungry? Are you boldly preaching the Word of God to those who don't know Him or His Love and Grace?
"If we do believe it, really believe it, that belief has radical implications on our lives."
For HIS Glory
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
This has been blowing my mind for the last week or so. It's just under 15 min... but watch it if you have time. It is incredible!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zWKm-LZWm4&feature=related
So Thanksgiving is just about here...I am so excited about this. Spending time with friends and family. Last night I was able to spend the evening with Lane. It was so much fun. We went to dinner, and talked for a long time. Sometimes I forget just how delicious Dewey's pizza is! A whole range of emotion occured throughout the night. Headed to Central West End to go to the Cup. So good!! We got a few cupcakes and some coffee and again just spent time talking about a bunch of stuff. On the way home I definately missed our turn, so we drove around the long way for a while, then relaized a Target run was in order. I am a quality time person... and so last night filled my cup pretty dang full.
This past Saturday night I was able to pick up Jenn Duck at the airport and get to spend some time with her while we drove to meet her mom. I love that I get to randomly see her when she flys home. And today I got to see Krysten and Brent Jenkins. It was completely unexpected, and totally great. They are driving to IL, so they stopped in St. Louis to grab some lunch. Great hugs were given.
The past few days have been really good for my soul. Thanks God, you knew I needed this. Now on to some Thanksgiving festivities. I am more excited about Friday than anything esle. Tomorrow's highlights will include watching Lane race in the morning, and spending some time with Carrie in the car on the way to/from Jeff City. ...that quite possibly is it. Friday's food/family/friends time will be epic!
As for today... Whit, Kayla, and I went to Cheeburger Cheeburger for lunch. It is different than what we normally do. It was a good time of fellowship and food for sure! I really enjoy those two! So greatful that I get to work with people like them.
For HIS Glory
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zWKm-LZWm4&feature=related
So Thanksgiving is just about here...I am so excited about this. Spending time with friends and family. Last night I was able to spend the evening with Lane. It was so much fun. We went to dinner, and talked for a long time. Sometimes I forget just how delicious Dewey's pizza is! A whole range of emotion occured throughout the night. Headed to Central West End to go to the Cup. So good!! We got a few cupcakes and some coffee and again just spent time talking about a bunch of stuff. On the way home I definately missed our turn, so we drove around the long way for a while, then relaized a Target run was in order. I am a quality time person... and so last night filled my cup pretty dang full.
This past Saturday night I was able to pick up Jenn Duck at the airport and get to spend some time with her while we drove to meet her mom. I love that I get to randomly see her when she flys home. And today I got to see Krysten and Brent Jenkins. It was completely unexpected, and totally great. They are driving to IL, so they stopped in St. Louis to grab some lunch. Great hugs were given.
The past few days have been really good for my soul. Thanks God, you knew I needed this. Now on to some Thanksgiving festivities. I am more excited about Friday than anything esle. Tomorrow's highlights will include watching Lane race in the morning, and spending some time with Carrie in the car on the way to/from Jeff City. ...that quite possibly is it. Friday's food/family/friends time will be epic!
As for today... Whit, Kayla, and I went to Cheeburger Cheeburger for lunch. It is different than what we normally do. It was a good time of fellowship and food for sure! I really enjoy those two! So greatful that I get to work with people like them.
For HIS Glory
Monday, November 21, 2011
In desprate need of Him
Have you ever been in a place of desprate need of something. When things just arent going right. Things feels like they are out of your control. The way you thought something would go... just isnt. I'm discovering something about myself. When I begin to feel like that I need to give up and run to Him. I find that this is something that happens when I put my hope in people or things rather than in the Lord. I have expectations for people in my life, and when they aren't met I end up boiling with anger or frustration, and I end up feeling empty. Someday I will learn and begin to see this pattern.
Isaiah 40:26-31
For HIS Glory
Isaiah 40:26-31
For HIS Glory
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Girls Weekend of Champions
This past weekend was incredible. We had our all-girls retreat. It was awesome. God did some huge things! Lindsay, our area director was the speaker and she my friends, knocked it out of the park! I'm talkin home run, grand slam each time. She spoke with emotion, and conviction, and passion.
I wasn't entirely sure what to expect from GWOC, this was my first ever FCA Camp of any kind, other than being a coach at LAX camp this summer... I didn't get the full effect at all. This was a whole new ball game.
We started the weekend off with a silly food relay. You know, the typical thinks like eating pudding and baby food with no hands, chugging a soda, eating saltines, chewing bubble gum and blowing a bubble, banana pass. Then we started straight in to the GOSPEL! Linds hit them hard right out of the gates, it was awesome. Had some worhip, which was led by my roommates, Gina and Kim. They did a great job! From night one kids were in tears. Now I am not all about the tears, if you know me at all, you know that I am not one who cries, it's something that takes a bit to get out of me. You could see it on the girls' faces that the Lord was working. One of the few kids I knew going into the weekend walked up to me and just fell into me sobbing. I knew the Lord had some good stuff to do in her life, and I could only begin to imagine what He had for the rest of the girls.
After a long day of setting up camp and getting everyone settled, Whit and I did bed checks and making sure there were no real issues going on. We make it back to our room around 1:30 or so. While walking around I was able to talk out some insecurities I've been wrestling through lately, one of which is feeling a lack of accountability. I have it in some areas, but in everyday areas, I don't really. So Whit suggested we keep one another accountable with some everyday things. So that was cool. Wasn't expecting that to come out of last Friday.
Saturday was awesome. Even more so then Friday. Lindsay again kept hitting the girlsand staff/volunteers with Truth. We played some dogpatch (our term for sports) and had some time in huddles to talk about the meetings (sessions). During the third talk Lindsay gave we all sensed some serious movement by the Spirit and decided to throw the schedule out the window just a bit and give the girls time after the talk to sit with their huddles or find staff to talk with. The talk was about our relationship with the world. So the Lord was tugging at the heart strings concerning friends and boys... talking about who in your life is an enabler...are you the enabler. It was so good.
The Lord blessed my heart in a way I never expected on Saturday afternoon. I had two really awesome conversations, one kid I knew, one kid I didn't. I was able to talk through some serious struggles with one girl who I think I am going to start meeting with. She is a great kid, but has no idea how to work through issues in her life. The second kid just started asking me all kinds of questions. It was awesome to chat with her as well.
We had a bonfire Saturday night, and there were so many little nuggets of blessings throughout the night. Made some new friends, and overall just really enjoyed little conversations, and watching ministry happen. So refreshing, and something I really needed to get re-vamped for this job. I love it... but I felt like something was missing from it.
Overall we had 71 girls come to GWOC. 41 of them made first time commitments or re-committed their lives to Christ. We had 21 Adult staff/college students who came and all willingly spelt on air matteress' because we ran out of beds due to the amount of girls that attended. 30 different schools were represented at GWOC and many of those huddles are struggling and now have girls ready to go back to do something about it. It's not about numbers... it's about with the Lord did this weekend!
I shall leave you with a few pictures.
Cailyn, myself, and Annie: Love these girls!
I wasn't entirely sure what to expect from GWOC, this was my first ever FCA Camp of any kind, other than being a coach at LAX camp this summer... I didn't get the full effect at all. This was a whole new ball game.
We started the weekend off with a silly food relay. You know, the typical thinks like eating pudding and baby food with no hands, chugging a soda, eating saltines, chewing bubble gum and blowing a bubble, banana pass. Then we started straight in to the GOSPEL! Linds hit them hard right out of the gates, it was awesome. Had some worhip, which was led by my roommates, Gina and Kim. They did a great job! From night one kids were in tears. Now I am not all about the tears, if you know me at all, you know that I am not one who cries, it's something that takes a bit to get out of me. You could see it on the girls' faces that the Lord was working. One of the few kids I knew going into the weekend walked up to me and just fell into me sobbing. I knew the Lord had some good stuff to do in her life, and I could only begin to imagine what He had for the rest of the girls.
After a long day of setting up camp and getting everyone settled, Whit and I did bed checks and making sure there were no real issues going on. We make it back to our room around 1:30 or so. While walking around I was able to talk out some insecurities I've been wrestling through lately, one of which is feeling a lack of accountability. I have it in some areas, but in everyday areas, I don't really. So Whit suggested we keep one another accountable with some everyday things. So that was cool. Wasn't expecting that to come out of last Friday.
Saturday was awesome. Even more so then Friday. Lindsay again kept hitting the girls
The Lord blessed my heart in a way I never expected on Saturday afternoon. I had two really awesome conversations, one kid I knew, one kid I didn't. I was able to talk through some serious struggles with one girl who I think I am going to start meeting with. She is a great kid, but has no idea how to work through issues in her life. The second kid just started asking me all kinds of questions. It was awesome to chat with her as well.
We had a bonfire Saturday night, and there were so many little nuggets of blessings throughout the night. Made some new friends, and overall just really enjoyed little conversations, and watching ministry happen. So refreshing, and something I really needed to get re-vamped for this job. I love it... but I felt like something was missing from it.
Overall we had 71 girls come to GWOC. 41 of them made first time commitments or re-committed their lives to Christ. We had 21 Adult staff/college students who came and all willingly spelt on air matteress' because we ran out of beds due to the amount of girls that attended. 30 different schools were represented at GWOC and many of those huddles are struggling and now have girls ready to go back to do something about it. It's not about numbers... it's about with the Lord did this weekend!
I shall leave you with a few pictures.
Cailyn, myself, and Annie: Love these girls!
Gotta have a silly picture... right!
For HIS Glory
Thursday, November 3, 2011
15 days and counting
My best friend comes home from college in 15 days! It has been 4 months and I am ready to spend some quality time with her again. Not sure how much I will get to see her... but I know one thing is for sure, I will value the time we do get. While she is at school, I enjoy getting texts from her that read something like the one I got today, "I just sawed a cat head open...wow, coolest thing ever. lol" One of many reasons I love her.
During Bible study monday morning Walt said something that struck me. We were talking about Halloween, and how he doesnt like the holiday becuase it is just another day where people dress up and wear masks to cover up who they really are. Wowsa! If you look at it that way, he has a great point. Walt is a very wise man, and I love learning from him. Halloween is a holiday that my parents let us celebrate with restrictions. We were never allowed to be anything satanic, or anything resembling death. My favorite year was when I was the Pink Power Ranger... hello! it was awesome!! Back on topic. If we think about it, we are all always wearing masks. We get up each day and get dressed to cover up who we really are. Not assuming everyone is like that every single day, but I do think it is safe to assume that everyone has done that at some point in time. What would the world be like if we all accepted each other for who we really are, for the trials we are really walking through, and for the faults we all really have. Reality is, we all have crap in our lives. We hate it, but it is there...and we don't like to admit we have it. Even worse, we actually talk about it. I wish we could all learn to love one another through the crap in our lives. Out ward appearence is one thing, but what is happening in the heart is what really matters. Believe me, I should listen to what I am writing too.
I need to chew on my other thoughts a bit more...
For HIS Glory
During Bible study monday morning Walt said something that struck me. We were talking about Halloween, and how he doesnt like the holiday becuase it is just another day where people dress up and wear masks to cover up who they really are. Wowsa! If you look at it that way, he has a great point. Walt is a very wise man, and I love learning from him. Halloween is a holiday that my parents let us celebrate with restrictions. We were never allowed to be anything satanic, or anything resembling death. My favorite year was when I was the Pink Power Ranger... hello! it was awesome!! Back on topic. If we think about it, we are all always wearing masks. We get up each day and get dressed to cover up who we really are. Not assuming everyone is like that every single day, but I do think it is safe to assume that everyone has done that at some point in time. What would the world be like if we all accepted each other for who we really are, for the trials we are really walking through, and for the faults we all really have. Reality is, we all have crap in our lives. We hate it, but it is there...and we don't like to admit we have it. Even worse, we actually talk about it. I wish we could all learn to love one another through the crap in our lives. Out ward appearence is one thing, but what is happening in the heart is what really matters. Believe me, I should listen to what I am writing too.
I need to chew on my other thoughts a bit more...
For HIS Glory
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